The Bruised, The Battered & The Broken: 27th February 1903

The next chapter in Astrið's story is here! Read about her adventures and misadventures from 27th February 1903 below, as Astrið deals with the aftermath of the shootout a few days earlier. You can check out her full diary here: Astrið's Diary

A couple of days after the shooting, I decided to stick my head out into Lagras village. No one else was there it seemed, so I made my way south into Saint Denis, to check telegrams to make sure everyone all else was ok.

I had multiple telegrams; from Elsie, from Lloyd, from Violet, from Matthew and from Daniel - all checking to see that I was doing ok after the events of a couple days ago.

Even Violet, it seems, couldn’t escape injury. She had her own injuries to deal with from a trip to Guarma.

Also among my telegrams was a telegram from Deputy Olya. She wants me to do a statement on what happened once I'm recovered enough. This could be interesting.... She already seems to know what she needs to, what else could my statement add?

I replied back to her saying that I don't know what else I could explain, that I left Clara with Deputy Parker in Valentine and that she would be better for filling in the blanks than I am. I should speak to Clara and Jayne.

After I telegrammed her, I telegrammed Clara, Jayne and Mr Alexio Gotti, to see if they are around to discuss things further.

And just like that, a wagon full of people I don't recognise turned up at the telegram office. It's still too soon after everything happened for me to be in a town around strange people on my own. I decided it was time to leave.

I headed out of Saint Dennis for Rhodes, trying to see if Clara or Jayne was at the Pavee camp there.

No sooner had I got to Rhodes, than I received word from Mr Gotti that he wanted to meet me in Saint Denis. I turned Grátt around and once again travelled through the swamps for the city.

I had a few more telegrams from Matthew Isaiah. With his background, and his apparent loyalty to me, it would have been good to have him by my side over the past couple of days. Maybe an extra gun, an extra set of hands would have helped in all then all this. Then again, maybe it would just have been another person to get injured……

I headed from telegrams up to the saloon to meet Mr Gotti, but no sooner had I left did I immediately started being followed by a man in a white shirt who started asking me a lot of questions. I figured he was fixing to rob me, so I just kept my head down and kept ushering Grátt forward towards the saloon - where Mr Gotti could surely assist me if the situation turned violent.

In saloon, Mr Gotti was there along with his entourage. He seemed a little intoxicated and not in the greatest of moods…..

I explained to him about the events of the last couple of days – it seems he hadn't been fully caught up in everything that happened. Filling in the blanks, I explained to him my intention towards Mr Miles. He said that he didn't care what happened to Miles, but that if I wanted to, he could help me get my revenge. I must confess the conversation was slightly off putting. After all, how can I guarantee results from somebody who has no stake in this?

Meeting concluded, I once again left Saint Denis - heading West towards Rhodes and then onwards to Valentine.

On the outskirts of Rhodes, I bumped into Teeki Rava who was travelling the opposite direction toward Saint Denis. Apparently he had heard Mr Gotti was there and wanted to speak to him. Apparently they have some form of prior relationship, but to what extent? I don't know. On seeing me, he in stead accompanied me back to Rhodes.

At the Rhodes telegram office, I bumped into Daniel checking telegrams. Happy to see him, I smiled and said hello and then prepared myself for what I was sure to be an onslaught of questions to come my way, given the past few days events.

He looked over my injuries. After all, I can hardly hide them: the scar under my eye, the pellet wounds to my face, my neck. At least my shirt covers the ones on my chest... He began to ask questions, but the middle of the telegram office wasn't the right place to discuss this. We agreed to go somewhere more private.

As we left the telegram office, a woman arrived. I recognised her as Seraphina Braithwaite: the woman who I had aimed my gun at while I was looking after Clara. Stupidly, I made a flippant remark to Daniel saying that I was surprised that she didn't hate me for pointing a rifle at her a few days ago.

In disgust, Daniel jumped from the horse and refused to get back on. He walked the rest of the way to the Pavee camp, leaving me to travel there alone with Teeki riding shortly behind.

With everything now done and concluded, I had a lot to catch Daniel upon: how Miles has been hunting down Clara for months, how the situation has been escalating and the Barton’s became involved, and ultimately the shootout and the events that happened the other day.

Defiantly, Daniel stood up and faced me, unhappy at my intentions. I hadn't voiced them, but then he knows me well enough to know that I want to go after Miles, that I want to make sure that I don't have to worry about my friends safety from that man ever again. As much as I tried to challenge him on what he thought my intentions were, I knew he already knew. He could read me like a book.

Our conversation was interrupted by a hail of gunfire coming from the direction of Rhodes. We took shelter inside one of the caravans: Teeki watching one door, myself watching the other.

After a few minutes, some horses rode past just down the road behind the other caravans. A few minutes after that, the silence was enough to tell us that the situation was probably safe. I ventured outside the caravan to make sure no one was around and we headed back outside.

Daniel and I stood in silence for a good few minutes. “There must be another way, Astrið”, he said. He tried to say that we should talk to them: diplomacy, mediation - any other route than violence.

I tried to explain to him that this situation had been going on for months, and that one way or another, all of those thing had been tried and nothing had worked. But he remained firm in his stance…..

With a firmness in his voice, I'd never heard before, he told me that he took an oath; an oath to never hurt someone and that he was going to stick by that - even though he wasn't part of the department anymore. His disdain for my intentions was palpable.

With Teeki crouched below us, the three of us sat in silence. I know Daniel isn't used to this life, he's not used to having to deal with what happens when your words fail. But by God, is he really going to hate me for doing this?

Tears filled my eyes. Goddamn it, I don't want to do this! I'd love further to be any other way for us to be sure that we'll be safe, other than by going after him. But what choice do we have? Miles has shown himself to not think straight, to not think clearly. We've all seen what happens when we don't act. I sure as hell don't want this, but what choice do I have?

It seems that Tibbs waking up from the other caravan was a perfect excuse for Daniel to make a move. “I need some air” he said, before turning to leave the camp.

I chase after him, not wanting this to be the end. Oh God, he really hates me, doesn't he? No sooner had I got to him than I had to turn away from him, trying to hide the tears filling my eyes.

He tried to explain that his oath meant he doesn't want to hurt anyone, that he'll do anything he can to avoid it, but I am my own person and his oath doesn't mean I can't do what I feel I need to.

I heard his words and I understood them. But just because I *can* do something he doesn't agree with, doesn't mean he won’t hate me for it.

I asked him if he still loved me, given everything that just happened. He asked me what kind of question that was - that of course he still loves me. But I am unsure…

I've never heard him to have such hatred in his voice before, let alone for it to be directed to me. He explained that we were having a fight and it was okay for us to be emotional. He wrapped his arms around me tightly, giving me a big hug, but reiterated again that he needed to go get some air. He said he would telegram me when he's ready to talk again.

And with that, he left the camp. Leaving poor Teeki Rava to deal with me in floods of tears.

Returning to the telegram office to check telegrams, I bumped into Clara and Johan. As much as I tried to deny it, no-one in that telegram office was blind to the fact that I was very upset.

Clara took me outside to talk about what was going on. I told her everything about the fight that Daniel and I had just had.

It felt like an age that we were outside talking about the situation. She tried to comfort me the best that she could, and with me able to regain just a little bit of self-control, we returned back inside.

A wagon arrived, with Bobby and Jayne at the reins, to take us back to Valentine. Jayne and Teeki were still too injured to ride horses on their own. So with Bobby, Clara, Johan and Teeki on the wagon and Jayne and I on my horse, we set off for Valentine.

Arriving in Valentine, Jayne and I spoke about what we were going to do. It seems Jayne has calmed down a little bit. She doesn't want to join me in going after Miles. She felt it would put Peregrine in harms way and she wanted to avoid that.

I was disappointed, but I understood. She said that if anything changed, if Miles starts going after us again, or the Bartons, then she's with me all the way. But for now, she wants to watch to wait and see what happens. She also highlighted her concerns about Clara: that if Clara takes any actions that brings us towards conflict again, then Jayne's going to distance herself. I agreed that I would too. And with that, we entered the saloon.

Cade had set up shop for the day. It was good seeing him again! It seems the repair work from the explosions in the saloon have been proceeding at blistering pace! Many hands make light work, and all that.
Now all the new furnishings had been put in place, you could hardly tell that the Miles gang had blown them half the place up with dynamite just a few days before!

However, that being said, Cade, not sticking his head out his room for a few days means he's missed most of this absolute nonsense that's befallen the rest of the group. We all went upstairs to his room to fill in the blanks with what was sure to be a long conversation…..

Clara was the last to join us in Cade's room, and with that, we got ready to tell our story. We agreed for simplicity that we would do this chronologically: Clara would discuss the events leading up to the incident in Strawberry, I would talk about the incident in Strawberry, Clara will talk about the shootout in Valentine, and Jayne and Johan would talk about what happened after Valentine and then I'd finish it off with what happened to Clara and I after that.

One by one, we all told our stories - the pain and the rawness of the emotions still palpable in our voices. Our injuries, both physical and emotional, still fresh from the events of just a couple of days before.

Towards the end of the conversation, Violet arrived. She listened closely as we told our stories. In an effort to cheer us up, she got us all into a circle and told us to put our hands together – I guess this is some kind of gesture to show our teamwork?

I stood behind Cade, uncertain. After all, it's not that easy to feel part of a group when I'm the only one that wants to go after Miles for what he did to me, what he’s done to all of us.

With that, we headed downstairs. Valentine was so-so: some people in the saloon, some people out in the street. Maybe we might get a normal night after all…..

Speaking again to Jayne, she expressed concerns that the sutures on her chest from where she was shot into the lung were too tight. They were causing her too much pain as she tried to move. I offered her to take a look at them and she agreed.

With that, we headed up to my room and I opened my cupboard to get my medical tools and supplies out, ready.

As I set up my medical kit on the table, Jayne took her shirt off. Her injury was quite severe, her sutures quite long around her chest – I would need all the space I could get to look after her properly. Thankfully, the sutures weren't torn or infected. It was a simple case of removing the sutures and redoing them, but slightly looser.

Medical work done, Jayne returned downstairs to the saloon as I finished cleaning and putting away my medical kit before returning myself.

Downstairs, the drinks were flowing - and with nothing else on the agenda, I decided to take a glass of rum. After all, having not been out of the crossing for a medical run in quite a while, I've got nothing else to dull this pain other than some good spirit!

After enjoying some drinks with us, a wave of tiredness came across Clara's face. Sensibly, she decided to head upstairs for the night. We said our good nights, and she disappeared into her room.

Of our group it was just Jayne, Teeki and I left. But of course, the saloon was still fairly busy, with the a big poker game going on on the other side of the saloon. As one man came through the door, I recognised who it was and went over to talk to him.

It was Mr Julio. Blissfully unaware of the last couple of days events, he was surprised and unsettled by all the scarring on my face from the healing gunshot wounds. We chatted briefly about what happened.

Well, with no room left at the poker table, all we could do was stand around and converse while the others played.

Spotting a man sat on the bench, Violet gasped in surprise before running upstairs. She came downstairs in a change of clothes that managed to look just like him. She laughed, saying she could pass for a Valentinian local.

The local man, however, his sideburns apparently hiding a proud face, took great offence to Violet looking like him. No sooner had she pointed that out, did he stand up and start trying to punch her. Violet, however, isn't new to such things and quickly made light work of him…..

…..So I carried him over to the medical office to go get looked at by the local doctor!

I returned back to the saloon, but no sooner had I got through the doors did the sounds of many horses riding into town fill the air. Before we could even begin to wonder who they were, The sound of gunshots rang out throughout the main street.

Unsure of their intention, we took our guns out and exited the saloon at the back - where we keep our horses.

Some folk were hiding, some walking, some running - we all left the saloon and got on our horses. With another volley of gunfire from the Main Street, it was time for us to take our leave of this town!

With the majority of the group heading south to Blackwater to continue their poker game, Violet, Teeki and I, together with the man I hadn't met before by the name of Carmine, headed north - taking the long route out of Valentine before circling eastwards towards Rhodes.

In a strange turn of events for Violet, she decided to go and speak to Sheriff Chevalier - knowing full and well that she might very well be wanted. Carmine, Teeki and I watched on as they spoke, unsure if their conversation would end smoothly or with her arrested.

After their conversation, Violet said she had to leave town, but thankfully not under the custody of Sheriff Chevalier! The sheriff going in one direction and Violet going in another, they left – leaving Mr Carmine, Teeki and I to head to the saloon for some drinks and some smokes.

Mr Carmine asked us what we thought of Violet, explaining the fact that he thinks she's a nice person - but she is more adamant that she is not. I explained to him that Violet has a nice side, but to the wrong person, she can be incredibly dangerous and incredibly violent when the mood suits her.

Mr Carmine bought me a couple of bottles of rum, while he enjoyed some bottles of whiskey. It seems he too wanted an excuse to unwind. He offered Teeki some, but Teeki doesn't drink the “fire water” - as he calls it.

After a few drinks, we decided that we would go and play some blackjack. Bottles in hand, we headed towards the bank to go and take some money to play with.

Joined once again by Mr Julio, we took our gambling money and headed up to the blackjack table at the parlor house. Even Teeki joined us in gambling - although entirely didn't understand the game!!

With amazing beginner's luck, Teeki was the only one of us who had any luck at the table. We played for about an hour, but in the end we all lost our money.

Our betting money expended, all that was left for us was to drink more of the “fire water”. It's funny how the weight of a horrible couple of days can be lifted after a few bottles of alcohol.

On the balconies, Mr Carmine was teasing me and winding me up. So when we went down the stairs, I got him to stand in front of the big, thick rug. Unsuspecting, I pushed him onto it - before running away, giggling!

Outside in the main street, we encountered Tibbs, who was giving away some wheat that she no longer needed to use. Waste not, want not: I took the spare wheat from Tibbs. I had some leftover animal fat from the other day – I could use that to cook up some bread!

Still very drunk, I think……. I think I remember waving to a little cat.

I began cooking up some tasty bread for us all to eat. As the bread was cooking, we continued our drunken conversations. Mr Carmine, no fan of the law it seems, brought up the topic of Sisika.

I was so drunk I hardly remembered what I said to him. But I'm sure I told him about my time there: about being set on fire, about being hung upside down from the scaffolding, about being made to run the obstacle course after my leg got hurt. I don't remember exactly what I said, but I remembered the smile dropping from his face - his hand resting meaningfully on top of his holster in anger.

But before too long the bread was cooked. I gave Teeki and Mr Carmine some fried bread and we sat, happily enjoying some tasty food - which thankfully sobered us up a tad!

With a big yawn, it was time for Teeki to find a place to sleep too, leaving just Mr Carmine and I to the night.

We headed down to the Telegram office and we found Deputy Grey and Deputy Olya in the Telegram office. With a big smile on my face, I waved hello! I think they could tell straight away that I was very drunk.

Deputy Grey smiled and asked me how I was getting on - but I could see the smile drop from his face when he spotted all my injuries. He remember him asking me if it was wise that I was drinking so much when I was injured. I explained that I wasn't allowed to go to buy more medicine, so that was all I had for the pain.

After the deputies left to return to the Sheriff's Office, I drunkenly tried to lock pick my way into the transit office part of the train station. An impressed Mr Carmine asked me if I was good at getting into places. I happily replied that I was, saying I could show him how, if he fancied a trip.

With an enthusiastic yes, we got on my horse and made off for Strawberry. Saint Denis was our ultimate destination, but if I'm going to teach somebody how to lock pick, I'm going to need more than just the one!

As we approached the gates to Strawberry, I couldn't help but feel a sinking feeling in my stomach. After all, the last time I was here was when I was gunned down by Mr Miles. Nevertheless, I took some comfort in the fact that we wouldn't be here for long.

At the general store, I tapped my fingers in a very specific pattern. With a knowing nod, the store keep leaned down behind the counter and took out a small dusty box - reserved only people only for people in the know. And with that, I bought a handful of lock picks before heading out of town.

From one end of Saints’ Crossing to the other, it was a lot of travelling, but we were finally within sight of Saint Denis. The time spent travelling the road thankfully sobering us up ahead of the task at hand.

Making our way through the bright, but sparsely populated night time streets of Saint Denis, we meandered our way towards the big church - over the road from which is the venue for lock pickers and safe crackers to learn their craft.

I took the first go at cracking the chest on the floor. After all, if Mr Carmine was to be successful, I'd need to know the contents of the chest to make sure he wasn't having me on.

It took me about twice the time it used to to get through the lock, but I did manage it without breaking a pick! I'll chalk the time delay up to the alcohol… In true fashion for this place, the chest was full of beans!

After that, it was Mr Carmine's turn. Kneeling down, I gave him the handful of lock picks and I took him through the technique he would need to use to move the pins, navigating the lock in such a way you'd eventually get it open. After a few minutes of trying, he broke all the picks. Unfortunately he didn't manage to get the lock open.

At least one thing you don't need a pick for is the safe cracking. Safe cracking is not my area of expertise, so I was quite keen to remind myself of how to do it. I kneeled down and put my hands up to the dial. It's been a long old time since I tried to work, one of these. Getting it open, I once again check the contents and closed and locked it ready for Mr Carmine to try.

With the safe locked, it was once against time for Mr Carmine to try his hand. Again, I walked him through the techniques and watched him as he turned the dials. Initially very unsure of himself, he started getting the hang of it. Hearing what to listen out for. Getting the clicks in the right place. And after a few minutes of trying. He successfully managed to open the safe!!!

I couldn't help but give a smile proud smile. Mr Carmine thanked me for showing him, but confessed that lock picking and safe cracking probably weren't for him.

And with that, Mr Carmine, too, was tired. His plan was to put his head down here in Saint Denis. I bid him good night, and left to make my way back to Valentine.

Arriving back in Valentine, I checked telegrams before bed. Deputy Olya, seeing me drunk in Rhodes, didn't want to do a statement from me while I was this intoxicated. But she still wants to speak to me - no doubt I'll have to catch her sometime later.

I also had a telegram from Miss Elise, one of the ones who helped me after I was shot. Weary of the shortcomings of her medical knowledge, she asked if I would be interested in taking her on for some medical training. I told her that I would, and when I got back to The Crossing, we could discuss further about what she wanted. With that and my head reeling from all the alcohol, I headed to my hotel room and to bed!!